Friday 5 April 2013

Love my body


Love your body. Words that make most women shudder or at least roll their eyes. Why is loving our body such a difficult concept for us women (and often men too) to grasp? This self-loathing that seems to sadly be part and parcel of growing up as a woman manifests itself in many a weird and wonderful way. There is overeating leading to obesity, starving yourself skinny, bingeing and then purging, over exercising to compensate and many other self-destructive behaviours that women adopt to deal with the fact they simply feel unable to love or accept their bodies. So in the midst of the craziness here what can we take stock of, what’s real, what’s true and what’s perhaps worth considering however hard it may be?

Firstly I think it’s important that I explain that I am incredibly fortunate not to have ever suffered with an eating disorder but some of my very close friends have. I have spent most of my life (as far back as I can remember) hating my body with varying degrees of passion but I do not profess to understand fully eating disorders. I do not judge those who still walk through this struggle daily and I don’t consider my insecurity to qualify me to speak on your behalf but I do have some points you may wish to consider anyway.

Secondly weight is just a number. Beauty is not a mathematical formula that equates inches on a waist to a sliding scale of beautiful. Your weight does not allow for the joy your smile brings to someone, it does not allow for your passions, it does not consider how smart you are or how kind. And it sure as hell doesn’t excuse you being mean, cruel, or a bully. This works both ways.

Beauty, it is often said, is in the eye of the beholder. How you perceive beauty differs from person to person. And thank God it does. Life would be so dull if everyone loved and wanted exactly the same thing in friends, colleagues and spouses. But this is not just a cop-out proverb your parents told you when other kids were mean to you it’s a real thing worth considering. Isn’t it worth striving not to be what someone wants to instead allowing yourself to be yourself where you are already wanted just as you are?

And here’s where I get a bit Christian on you. God is the ultimate beholder. He sees beauty with far more clarity than we do. He, in all his infinite wisdom, strength and holiness made you exactly as you are for a specific reason. He truly believes in the life he gave you. He does not make mistakes. He believes we are beautiful and capable of captivating wonder. So while the media will push on with forcing its agenda on you long after you’ve stopped caring why not pin your hopes on one that won’t fail you. One that will unconditionally and relentlessly love you with such a ferocity you can’t possibly fathom? Just something worth considering perhaps.

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